Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
