did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Randomize
