i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
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