yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
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I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
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How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
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