A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
I smell stomach acid.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
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Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
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My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.