did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
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That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
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Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
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