Kiss
Puke
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
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