Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
