I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
My ATM looks so different sober.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize