Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
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