My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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