god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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