it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
