Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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