She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
