i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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