Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize