I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
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