Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
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