you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
COCAINE IS GR8
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Randomize
