my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Randomize
