I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
Randomize
