I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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