she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
