The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
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