I puked a lego.
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
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