so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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