So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize