If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
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