My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
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