TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
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