I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
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