Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
