You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
