jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I smell stomach acid.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
there is glitter all over my balls
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
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