Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
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