I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
Randomize
