found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
