Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
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