dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.