Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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