Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
