I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
