This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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