I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Randomize