yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
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