real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Randomize
