I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
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