he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize