So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
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