My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
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